Bye Bye Baggage

January 28, 2009

We have looked at baggage for the last few days.  We have heard about where it comes from.  We have learned that we must accept the attachments before we can finally let go of the baggage.  Today we will go through the process of actually letting go of our baggage.

 

A brief look at letting go

It is quite a tall order to attempt to explain how to let go of attachments in a five hundred word post.  I will give it my best.

 

As we have discussed previously, we must first recognize that we do not want the attachments which make up our mental baggage.  This usually comes from the pain caused by those attachments.  We must get to a point that we see that we will achieve greater true happiness by letting go of our attachments.

 

It is like changing a habit

Once we have decided to let go of an attachment it takes a bit of practice to completely resolve it.  If you think about the fact that you have been holding on to the attachment for many years you will see that it has become a deeply ingrained habit.  It is said that it takes at least thirty days to change a habit.  Attachments take at least thirty days to resolve.

 

The first step in letting go of an attachment is to realize that it will take a few days to accomplish.  We are changing our thinking patterns and that will take a bit of time.  Also, we may still experience the pain of the attachment during this process.  Don’t let this stop you.  Realize that as long as you keep letting go of the attachment it will eventually leave.  When it leaves you will be one step closer to true happiness.

 

The mechanics of letting go

This may be the most difficult part to explain.  Everyone eventually develops their own technique.  I will share some things that have helped me.

 

For me, the most effective technique is to acknowledge the attachment when it causes me pain.  If I feel pain because I am in a relationship and am worried about being liked, I tell myself that it is not important if the other person likes me.  What is important is that I like myself.  As long as I like myself then it does not really matter if the other person likes me.

 

That piece of thinking has helped me to get out of relationships that were not healthy because I was sacrificing myself to be liked by someone else.  Over time I have learned to like myself and build much healthier relationships with people who also like themselves.

 

Another thought pattern that I have changed is my attitude towards money and possessions.  I used to equate my identity to money and possessions.  To change that attachment I started telling myself that my true self had nothing to do with money or possessions.  False self bases its identity on money and possessions.  True happiness comes from understanding the proper relationship with these things.  I would tell myself that true happiness comes from true self – not false self.

 

A process of repetition

For me, letting go of attachments has been a process of telling false self not to continue to hold on to the things that make us unhappy.  It is really a process of training false self to trust true self for true happiness.  If you keep at it long enough I guarantee that you will start to do the same for yourself.

 

I would very much like to hear your stories about letting go of attachments.  Please submit your comments and share how you have learned to walk the path towards true happiness.

 

Until tomorrow –

 

Es kava turen hai

We work towards an identical goal.

 

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© Copyright 2009 by KanDu Associates, LLC 

 

The content of this blog is copyrighted by KanDu Associates.  All rights are reserved by the owner.  For reprint information please email:

 

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We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Baggage

January 27, 2009

This is a paraphrase of a famous line from the movie “The Treasure of the Sierra Madre.”  Yesterday we looked at how we create and accumulate mental baggage.  Today we will look at how to recognize and accept that same baggage.

 

Baggage equals attachments

Yesterday we showed how mental baggage comes from our attachments.  We learn to let go of our mental baggage in the same way learn to let go of our attachments.

 

In some earlier posts we wrote extensively about how to release attachments.  Today we will summarize the techniques we talked about earlier.  I strongly recommend that you look at the archives from August 2008 to learn more about attachments and how to get rid of them.

 

Accepting the attachment

I can sit here all day and tell you that you have an attachment and that it is causing you pain.  However, until you realize that you are in pain and that pain is coming from an attachment you will not do anything about the attachment.

 

Therefore, the first step in letting go of our baggage is to see that we are in pain.  This can be a difficult step for many of us.  Many of us are too embarrassed or too proud to admit that we are in pain.  This would mean that there is something “wrong” with our life.

 

Accepting the pain

Unfortunately the pain eventually becomes so great that we can no longer act as if there is nothing wrong.  We can no longer deny the pain because it keeps smacking us in the face.  The pain is so great that we say to ourselves that there must be a better way.

 

When we have reached the point that we admit that we are pain the next step is to accept that the pain comes from an attachment.  That seems so simple.  For many of us it is a very difficult step.

 

Accepting that the pain comes from an attachment means that we have to look at ourselves.  That means we have to take responsibility for the pain.  It also means that we can no longer blame someone or something else for our pain. 

 

Many of us find that hard to do – we want all of our problems to be caused by external situations.  That means that we do not have to look at ourselves for the answer.  Unfortunately, this state of denial only continues the pain.

 

By rolling up our sleeves and getting to work on our pain and attachments we learn that the answers are entirely in ourselves.  We see that we have chosen to be attached to ideas, people, and objects.  No one “made” us form these attachments.  We formed these attachments because we had not yet learned a better way.  Now we are learning a better way.  Now we can learn to let go of our existing attachments and hopefully keep from forming any new ones.

 

Tomorrow we will look at how to release those attachments.  Really – we don’t need no stinkin’ baggage.  Tomorrow we will see how to let it go.

 

Until tomorrow –

 

Es kava turen hai

We work towards an identical goal.

 

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Copyright

© Copyright 2009 by KanDu Associates, LLC 

 

The content of this blog is copyrighted by KanDu Associates.  All rights are reserved by the owner.  For reprint information please email:

 

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Let Go of the Baggage!

January 26, 2009

Today we will look at baggage.  We will see how we accumulate mental baggage, why we keep it, and how to let go of it.  That is a large task for a five hundred word posting.  It may take several posts to get through this topic.

 

What is this baggage?

Mental baggage consists of all those thoughts, objects, and people to whom we have become attached.  It is a common misperception in our society that attachments are good.

 

We hear people talk about being attached to their pets, their children, their possessions, and many other things.  They think it is normal.  In truth, each attachment actually is very detrimental.

 

A short history of baggage

To go back in history a bit, the Romans used the word impedimenta to describe baggage.  This was usually used to describe all the things (baggage) that Roman soldiers had to carry with them during a military campaign.  Although useful and necessary, their baggage was an impediment to their ability to move quickly.

 

When we talk about mental baggage we are referring to the impediments that keep us from thinking clearly.  I place attachments of every type in the category of baggage.  If you would like to read more about attachments please go to a post we wrote about why attachments are painful.

 

So why do we accumulate baggage?

The primary reason that we accumulate mental baggage is that we never let go of anything.  Think about it.  Are you still carrying around a hurtful situation from when you were a child?  Maybe it is something that happened at school.  Maybe it is something that your parents did to you.

 

As long as you still feel hurt you have baggage.  The reason that you have baggage is that you have chosen to be attached to the hurt.  Think of some of the things that you “can never forgive someone for.”  Those are also attachments that are very deep.

 

We also wrote a post about a famous film director who held on to a grudge for many years.  Years after the person who had caused the supposed hurt had died, this man continued to harbor a grudge.  That is definitely baggage.

 

We also accumulate baggage through our attachments to things and people.  Please peruse the archives of this site for postings about those types of attachments.  In short, we can become attached to any thought, object, or person that we choose.  Those attachments become baggage.

 

Another unfortunate thing about baggage is that it accumulates as we get older.  If we never learn to let go of our baggage it can do nothing else.  It will not usually go away all by itself.  That is why so many people get bitter and unhappy as they get older.  They have accumulated a lifetime of impediments to clear thinking that keeps from being happy.

 

The good news is that we can learn to let go of the baggage at any age.  Tomorrow we begin to look at how to do that.

 

Until tomorrow –

 

Es kava turen hai

We work towards an identical goal.

 

Subscribe

 

Don’t miss any updates.  Get daily posts by email.  Subscribe to this blog by clicking here: SUBSCRIBE

 

This email list is maintained by FeedBurner, a subsidiary of Google.  I hate to receive spam and advertisements in my email.  I will never sell your email address for such purposes.

 

Email

You can email us directly at:  noahnow@yahoo.com

 

Copyright

© Copyright 2009 by KanDu Associates, LLC 

 

The content of this blog is copyrighted by KanDu Associates.  All rights are reserved by the owner.  For reprint information please email:

 

noahnow@yahoo.com