Finger Pointing and Forgiveness

December 18, 2008

Yesterday we looked at a bit of spiritual logic regarding forgiveness.  That post received several comments.  The comment from Ruth got me thinking about an earlier post titled “Pointing Fingers”.  Today we look at similarities between these two posts.

 

Pointing fingers

The main idea of the post titled “Pointing Fingers” was that whenever we point a finger we always have three pointing back at us.  You can easily prove this to yourself by looking down at your hand and pointing your finger.  You have three pointing back at you.

 

The meaning of those three fingers is that we have to take responsibility for ourselves before we can attempt to “blame” someone else.  When we are honest with ourselves we find that we have an awful lot of stuff to work on.  We do not really need to waste time blaming someone else for things we feel they have done to us.

 

Forgiveness

This is where forgiveness comes in.  When we want to point a finger at someone else we actually wind up forgiving them when we notice the three fingers pointing back at us.

 

That is what happens when we really start to understand what those fingers pointing at us mean.  They say to us “How can you blame some one else when you are doing the same thing yourself?”  We have mentioned this idea before.  When we do not like what some one else is doing it is usually because we are doing the same thing and we do not like that we are also doing it.

 

To prove this to yourself just watch the people around you.  When someone complains about what someone else is doing be quiet and watch their behavior.  You will usually find that they are doing exactly what they are complaining that other people do.  By extension, that means we are probably behaving the same way.

 

Forgiving ourselves

Here is the main point for today’s post.  When we recognize the three fingers pointing back at us let’s start recognizing that this is also a reminder to forgive ourselves.  Self forgiveness can be the most difficult kind of forgiveness.

 

Self forgiveness requires self acceptance, objectivity, lack of denial, being in the moment, and many more things.  However, self forgiveness is the most powerful kind of forgiveness.

 

When we really start to forgive ourselves we finally start to like ourselves.  When we like ourselves we have true self confidence.  True self confidence is the most powerful tool we possess.  True self confidence harnesses the vast power of our true self which has always accomplished everything we, as true self, ever chose to do.  But that is another post.

 

That is all for today.  Remember – those three fingers pointing back at you are one of the most powerful tools you have.

 

Until tomorrow –

 

Es kava turen hai

We work towards an identical goal.

 

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The Logic of Spirituality – Forgiveness and Acceptance

December 17, 2008

On Sunday I was at a gathering where the speaker talked about forgiveness.  It was a very good speech and there were a number of good points made about the idea of forgiveness.  During the discussion I made a point that connected forgiveness and acceptance – which will be the subject of today’s post.

 

Forgiveness

I have yet to write a post for this site that specifically addresses forgiveness.  However we have touched on it in several posts.  I promise to write a post on forgiveness soon.  For now let’s take a quick look at forgiveness.

 

There are a few interesting misnomers about forgiveness.  One is that if we forgive someone then they are supposed to do something for us.  When we expect something back because we are forgiving, then we are not being in the moment.  Any action we take where we have an attachment or expectation of a specific outcome will always cause us sadness and pain.

 

An interesting thing about forgiving is that most of the time we are actually forgiving ourselves.  I have found this to be particularly true.  As I have learned to forgive other people I have also learned to forgive myself.  In forgiving myself I am then much more able to forgive others.  This is a very positive circle of self improvement and empowerment.

 

Finally, many of us think that if we forgive something that means we agree with it.  This idea came up at Sunday’s discussion.  The specific idea was that one person said they could never forgive Hitler.  The point was made that there is a difference between forgiving and condoning.  We must learn to forgive but not condone.

 

Acceptance

To me, acceptance is another way of forgiving.  I wrote a bit about this in the earlier post titled “I Accept It – But I Don’t Like It”.  There are similarities here to the previous idea of the difference between forgiving and condoning.

 

As far as I am concerned, acceptance is the same thing as unconditional love.  We use the word “love” for far too many things.  When I use the word love I usually clarify what I am saying by using the term unconditional love.  By saying this I am making “love” a specific action, not an emotion.

 

The logic

Here is the spiritual logical link between these two terms.  When I am practicing forgiveness then I am also loving unconditionally.  If am not able to forgive someone then I am also putting conditions on the way I love them.  I am saying that you did something for which I cannot forgive.  I can only love you if you do something to change whatever it is for which I cannot forgive you.

 

This is actually a very large condition – I cannot love someone when I cannot forgive them.  In order to be forgiving we must love unconditionally.  In order to love unconditionally we must be forgiving.

 

Extra credit

Today’s extra credit idea is about forgiving ourselves.  When we cannot forgive someone else for something it usually is because we cannot forgive ourselves for the same thing.  Think about it.  Please submit a comment if you want to discuss it further.

 

Until tomorrow –

 

Es kava turen hai

We work towards an identical goal.

 

Subscribe

 

Don’t miss any updates.  Get daily posts by email.  Subscribe to this blog by clicking here: SUBSCRIBE

 

This email list is maintained by FeedBurner, a subsidiary of Google.  I hate to receive spam and advertisements in my email.  I will never sell your email address for such purposes.

 

Email

You can email us directly at:  noahnow@yahoo.com

 

Copyright

© Copyright 2008 by KanDu Associates, LLC 

 

The content of this blog is copyrighted by KanDu Associates.  All rights are reserved by the owner.  For reprint information please email:

 

noahnow@yahoo.com